Friday 28 December 2007

Chatting with a quiet friend



Sat beside the window, the book in my hands was slowly closed with my eyes stopped and shifted its sight to the old lamp post outside the wooden frame, an old friend of mine...
"It was a quiet night.."
"Sometimes, I really hope that you can answer me, my old friend. Hope that both of us can really chat to each other, chat and share secrets together. Unlike now.."
"She" remained in silent again. It wasn't anything unusual for a lamp post to be quiet. It was just me, an idiot who hoped for such absurd and impossible. I started the one-sided chatting with her again, same old chatting that we shared for years...
"I still remember when I was a small child, you was like my mom. Years passed and you switched your role from a mother, to a sitter and now becoming a close friend of mine, closest and the most trustworthy friend."
"It really has been many years, isn't it? And from time to time you play the role of the quiet listener of mine. For times, you witnessed the dropping of my tears and for times, you comforted me with your unique ways.."
"You mesmerise me everytime I see you, you know? Tonight, you stunned me with your work of art. Tonight, you show me how beautiful can ordinary green leaves be under your soft touch.."
Wearing a gold dress with black at the very end, they danced elegantly with the wind. Moving from side to side, they danced with their invinsible partner. Unable to see the one who's holding, they just depend on their feelings; Feeling each other's present, regconising each other's touch, they shaped out their love ones. What may seemed to unrealised by most throughout the time is actually a display of love that shattered the invinsible walls in between named differences, most importantly, love that brings along unlimitted forgiveness.
Who will expect that one can falls in love with one from far away, with one that one can never see?
But who will ever expect...one can forgives one that has contacts with so many others?
Guess "she" peeked into my mind again. Guess "she" knew that I was going to tell her about the pain and tears of mine trying to forgive someone I love. Past is something that none can never undone. And I know...that I should remove it from my head or embrace it with an open heart. I realise that long ago. It's just......
"I know, you're showing me how beautiful my story can be if I can forgive her and accept her past... I know that.."
"Those pain that ran all over my heart everytime I bear the image of what happened... They weren't a feeling that I would like to feel but my thoughts just couldn't help themselves to bring every words she told me to become pieces of pictures that cut through me.."
"I tried, I really did.."
"...but...."
The whole sentece was left hanging and suddenly, I shared the touch of the wind. Perhaps, I didn't try hard enough. Or perhaps, my love isn't as strong as his. But I know.. I know to love someone, one must forgives one's past and embrace it together. Times, our love loses its balance and times, we pull it before it falls. My love for her may not as strong as his right now..but I believe that it won't be much differences from his. And in time...they will be equal and both me and her will be much more happier than now...
Kisses, touches, everything...
"It'll be very painful and I'll be knocked off for times, but I'll continue to try...even with my heart torned and cut, I'll continue to try. Not for the sake of prooving my love, but for my love for her.."
"It has been so long I wish for the rain on my face. Finally..."
"Thank you..thank you, my old friend.."