Sudden feelings, sudden actions and unforgetable happiness

Bit by bit,
I start to feel my chest is gaining weight..

Beat by beat,
I start to lose sense of my heartbeat..

Breathe by breathe,
I start to sense it's getting tougher for me to breath..

And slowly,
my mind is consumed by disturbance,
every picture's just getting dim..

Those feelings...

Time after time,
I checked my phone..

Word after word,
I typed and also deleted..

Name after name,
I checked through the contact list that I have..

Those actions...

Feelings and actions...
Everything just seems to be out of my control in a sudden. I just couldn't explain the reason, I just couldn't restrain myself out of it, I just couldn't stop it..I just couldn't...

My chest is getting heavier by every passing second and I just lose sense of my heartbeat, every breathe of mine just gets tougher and my mind keeps on feeling disturbed for unknown reason..not long after I received the last messege from her.

Maybe it has things to do with those feelings, maybe not..but..

I just couldn't help myself to check my phone from time to time..check the bar on my left side on the screen and check those names in my inbox.

I typed few words like "U there?", "U ok?", "There?", "Hello?"...
But when it asks me to type the number that I want to send to..

I just press the right key and delete every words I typed,

afraid that you'll get into trouble because of me sending out those words..

I checked name after name in all of my contact list..whether it's in my computer or my phone.

All these, I didn't really know why I'll do all these as well..just a soft voice..a soft inner voice asked me to do so..

................. .... ........ . . . ...................
. .... ......................... ........... .
... ......... . . .................. ...........................


I just couldn't held myself back any longer..

"There?"
I typed it...with her phone number as the destination of my messege.

"..help me to sms xinto see whether she'ok..can?"
I typed it...and our sister's phone number becomes the recipient.

.......... ..... . . ...
.................... ..... . . ....... . .
....... ................ . ...... ... ...

Suddenly, a nudge of my phone broke me free from those chains. And the sender's name... It's her.... It's her.......

My mind is still blank but those disturbances that troubled me have fade. Those weights on my chest fade too and I can sense clearly, every beating of my heart, every breathe I take just becomes smoother than ever.

A thin smile slowly emerges on my face and those tears of mine just flows down on my face...

I feel so happy, happy that she replied me with a feeling of joy and cheerfulness, happy that she's ok..

I feel very happy..and that feeling, it's something that I can never forget..never forget...